why
by XxVampireGirlLovesEdwardXx
Summary: after being together for months why did Edward leave Bella without word or a goodbye?What happens when Bella leaves Forks and the other Cullens and mets her new friends?What happens when she get addicted to drugs will there ever be a way out?E/B R/EM A/J
1. Chapter 1

**Why!**

**Chapter One**

**Bella's Pov**

"How could he just leave me like this" I said as the tears begun to fall harder.

"We are so sorry Bella, we didn't no." Alice said defending her brother.

How the hell can she lie to my face like this I thought we were all friends I'm obviously wrong.

"You all knew didn't you? How stupid do you think I am" I shouted.

"No I swear Bella we didn't." She said defeated. LAIR. I mentally shouted.

"So you're telling me you never saw this coming Alice, because you never miss anything Alice so don't you dare fucking lie to me." I shouted as the tears fell down harder.

"We're sorry Bella." Alice said.

"Save it. I thought we were friends but obviously not I can actually understand because you're all perfect and I'm just plain weak human Bella. You know what I'm done Just get out none of you are true friends, I don't want to see any of you again." I said falling to the floor crying.

"Please Bella." Emmett said brokenly.

"Just go." I shouted.

They finally just left and I spent the rest of the night curled into a ball crying, how could he just leave me and especially now I need him more than anything.

Days passed and Charlie became more and more worried about me.

I was like a walking zombie only answering direct questions with people. My friends at school stopped talking to me and I just ignored the looks of worry the Cullen's kept looking at me with. I just keep the hope that he will come back to me but like why would he I'm nothing special, just plain old Bella.

"Bella. Just stop it okay just stop it."Charlie suddenly shouted.

"Stop what?" I asked totally confused.

"It's been three months Bella, he isn't going to come back. Three god damn months and you done nothing but hope and walk around like a zombie only answering to a direct question. I've had enough, I think it would be better if you went to stay with Renee in Jacksonville." He said sadly.

"You don't want me either." I whispered as tears fell down.

"Bella I didn't mean..."

"Shut up, you don't want me and you want me to stay with mum. You don't want me." I said sadly as more tears fell.

"Fine, I'll leave but I'm not going to Jacksonville." I said as I ran up to my room.

I slammed the door shut and started to pack what little I owned. Half an hour later I was finished packing and brought all my stuff to my car.

"Come on Bells you know I never meant it like that." Charlie said.

"You said you wanted me to go to Jacksonville, you want rid of me just like him, like Edward you want me out of your life just like he wanted me out of his, I can't believe this, don't you think I'm hurt enough, all this is killing me and I'm sick of you both treating me like I don't get a say in what happens because I fucking do I do get a say in what happens in my life because all this is affecting my life no one else's." I shouted, tears started to fall as I turned back to my car I caught Esme, Carlise, Rose, Emmett, Alice and Jasper's worried expressions.

"Enjoying the fucking show are you?" I shouted as I got into my car.

I didn't look back as I drove off. I kept on driving and I didn't stop or slow down until I reached Port Angles. I was lucky I kept saving all that money Charlie and Renee give to me each month because I am basically rich with all that I have saved and they will keep putting money in so I never will have to worry. I drove passed a couple of motels until I found one that looked quite nice.

After I checked in I unpacked most of my stuff and then took a long hot shower to relax me. Once I got out I put on my black faded skinny jean and my band t- shirt with a waist coat over the top. Once I put my red converse on I locked up and left the motel room.

Arr stupid phone hasn't stopped ringing. As I was looking who was calling, I wasn't looking where I was going and bumped into a group of friends.

"Oh god I'm so sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going." I rattled on.

"Na it's okay. I'm Jason."He said holding his hand out.

"Bella." I said shaking his hand.

"Well Bella, this is Jake, Ashley, Josh and Tom." He said pointing to the three guys and girl.

"Nice to meet you all." I said.

"You new round here, haven't seen you before." He asked.

"Yes."

"Oh cool, where do you and your family live." He asked.

"Well I'm staying at the motel just round the corner. As for my Dad Charlie he lives in Forks and my Mom Renee lives in Jacksonville with my stepdad Phil." I said as a few tears fell.

"Oh, how comes you're on your own." He asked.

"I'm starving so how about we get something to eat and I'll tell you about it." I said.

"Sure." He said.

We were walking for about ten minutes before we stop at this rock café. After we all ordered, I filled them in on Ed- him and everything that happened, well apart from that they are vampires because I'm pretty sure they will get me locked up if I told them that. We chatted for ages, I was glad I had met them they are all so nice towards me and I could see me and Ashley becoming great friends.

"We're going to this awesome party later you want to come with us?" Ashley asked excitedly. "Erm sure, it's not as if I have anything else to do." I said.

"Cool, you can come to mine along the way to get ready, I have an outfit that will look totally hot on you." She giggled.

A while later and we were on our way to Ashley's house, as soon as we got there the guys stayed outside while she basically dragged me to her room.

"Right, put this on." She said coming out of her walk-in closet. She handed me a baby blue strapless dress that came above mid-thigh and a pair of baby blue heels.

"Ready." I said as I walked out of her bathroom.

"W-O-W. You look hot Bells." She said.

"Thanks, You too." I said. She had a purple strapless dress that came just above mid-thigh with matching purple heels.

"Lets go." She said excitedly.

"WOW. You both look stunning." Jason said.

We all carried on walking and chatting about ten minutes later we were finally here.

As soon as we got inside Jason and the others went to get me and Ashley a drink.

"Hey you want some." Ashley said pulling out some weed to smoke.

Do I? Will it take away all this pain I am feeling?

"O-okay." I stumbled out.

"Don't worry Bella, this here will take away all your pain, I promise." She said lighting her fag up.

She handed me the lighter and I followed what she did, I breathed in and started to cough.

"Like this." She said showing me to inhale it properly.

"Lady's." Jason said handing our drinks to us.

"Thanks." I said feeling lighter already.

Once we finished most of the weed Ashley brought, Jason got out something stronger. I was already wasted from smoking so much but it was helping it was taking all my pain away and I never wanted it to come back.

"What's that?" I slurred.

"Coke." He said handing some to everyone. "You want some?" he questioned when he got to me.

"Okay." I slurred.

I'm completely free from all pain possible, the alcohol, weed and cocaine where all working. I felt nothing and I was happy and carefree, for once I was enjoying myself. Since Ed-him I thought I would never be the carefree person I am now and you know what I love it.

The rest of the night passed with more alcohol and drugs.

"Arrrr. My head." I moaned as I sat up in bed looking at Ashley. The guys where all still asleep on her floor. I don't even remember getting here.

"Morning." She sang sounding a lot like Alice, which brought a new round of pain crushing down on me.

The pain was getting worse by the minute I needed something to take the pain away and fast.

"Have you got any weed left?" I asked Ashley.

"Yeah, top draw." She said.

I got up feeling slightly dizzy but ignored it and walked to her desk and opened the top draw finding a massive stash of weed.

I got one out and walked over to her balcony and lit up my fag and took a long drag. After a couple of minutes the pain started to fade.

"Where's Bella?" I heard Jason say.

Ashley told him where I was and he came out to see me.

"How you feeling." He asked.

"Much better now." I said handing him the fag.

"Thanks. You're starting early." He laughed.

"It helps take the pain away from everything that has happened." I said.

"Oh, that's good then." He said.

"Will you be able to get me some weed and coke?" I asked straight forward.

"Erm Bella I don't know if all this is the answer." He said.

"I know it's just for when the pain gets to bad I promise." I lied.

Two months have passed and I was always partying and drugged up, never really sober anymore, I was always smoking weed and every other day I would take coke. My friends started to get worried at how I was always taking other drugs as well. I stopped eating because the drugs had stopped my apatite which made them worry even more.

"Bella, my parents want to move to Forks and the guys have asked and they are coming to stay with me and my family until after graduation and we want you to come to. It will be so much fun. Bella please." She begged.

After I left Forks I made a promise to myself I would never go back but I don't want to lose my friends. Just brave up Bella, you can do this, you still have the drugs if it gets to hard.

"Okay. When do we leave?" I asked.

"In two days." She said happily.

I just hope they are not still there.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**Bella's Pov**

The last two day where spent packing and sorting arrangement out back at Forks.

"I can't believe we are leaving today." Ashley said.

"Mmm." I said lighting up my weed.

"Jason, Jake and Josh are coming with you and Tom is coming with me and my family." She said smiling.

"Okay." I replied simply.

After a while we all got into the cars and I drove of while Ashley's parents followed.

After an hour or so we finally reached the 'WELCOME TO FORKS' sign. It had been months since I had been here, what if I can't cope.

"Bella. Bella." Jason said bring me back from thought.

"What. Erm I'm fine." I stumbled out.

He just looked at me worriedly.

"Finally." Jake cheered.

The other two laughed and I just looked at the house in front of us, or should I say mansion.

After unpacking I walked out to the garden and just walked into the little forest joining there garden. Lighting up my weed, I took a long drag, and then took a swig of the vodka that I brought out with me.

"Bella. I've been looking for you, are you o…." He said trailing off when he took the sight of me in.

I was completely wasted and drugged up.

"You promised." He said sadly.

"I only promised to get what I wanted, so just leave it the fuck alone. Okay Jason." I slurred.

"Bella, you need help please."

"Fuck you, I don't need help okay I'm perfectly fine." I slurred as I stumbled forward.

"We have school tomorrow so we need to get you sobered up." Ashley said walking toward me and Jason.

"I'm fine." I slurred stumbling my way back to the house.

Ashley and Jason followed closely behind me, ready to catch me if I fell. Once I finally made it to the house I went straight to my room slamming the door in frustration as I felt the pain sliding it way back through the wall I had built. I lit up another and smoked in the weed, feeling a sense of relief through me. The rest of the night passed by in a bit of a blur as I carried on drinking and smoking.

"Wakey, Wakey. Rise and shine sweet cheeks." Ashley said jumping on my bed.

"No five more minutes." I said back lazily.

"No we have an hour and half to get ready, now up." She said getting angry.

"Fine. I'm up." I said getting out of bed.

"Good." She said walking out back to her own room.

I got into the shower just standing under the steamy hot water, to try and relax myself for the day. After I finished washing my hair I got out of the shower and dried myself off. I put on my matching rock underwear and pulled on my black faded skinny jeans with my band t-shirt, I added a waist coat over the top and put my red converse on. I put some black eyeliner and mascara on with a tiny amount of foundation and blusher. I couldn't be bothered to dry my hair so I scrunched it up with muse and let it fall down in waves. I grabbed my bag and keys, and then made my way downstairs where everyone was waiting.

"You're breakfasts on the table." Ashley said.

"I'm not hungry." I replied walking out and lighting up my weed.

Ten minutes later and they had all finished and made their way to my car. I finished my fag and started driving. About five seconds into the drive I couldn't take the silence so I shove the pretty reckless album in and put the volume high up.

"Where here. Where here." Ashley said excitedly.

"Oh fucking fantastic." I muted getting out of my car and lighting up another.

Everyone in the car park turned to face us and the whispers started.

"I thought she left." Jessica said.

"Oh great Bella's back." Another one of Laurens friend said.

"Slag is back." Lauren said.

"I thought she was never going to come back." Mike said.

"Just shut the fuck up." I shouted as I walked passed her group.

"Get lost no one wants you here Swan." Lauren sneered.

"Fuck as if I care, as if I ever wanted to come back here to see you're fucking plastic face." I shouted up in her face. I watched in joy as she cowered back.

"Shut it Swan." She said shaking a bit.

"Or what?" I challenged.

"No one wants you here just like Edward never wanted you." She said with a smile seeming happy with herself.

Something in me just switched and I was full of anger and hate. I raised my hand and slapped her as hard as I could. She just stood there shocked for a bit until she thumped me in my lip which made it bleed. I wasn't just going to take it. We carried on fighting until someone huge took a hold of me pulling me back. All I was seeing was red and I wanted her dead whatever the cost.

"Fucking let go now." I shouted.

"You're fucking mental Swan, at least we all know why Edward left you" Lauren screeched.

The red got more worse and I managed to get out of whoever was holding me back and went at her all over again and I heard scream which came from someone who was watching but I never stopped I just carried on until whoever got their grip back on me and pulled me back again.

"Just stop Bella." Ashley said standing in front of me.

"Fuck you." I spat. "Fucking let me go." I sneered.

"Please stop Bella." The voice whispered in my ear and I froze in shock as I realized who had a hold of me.

As he realized I froze he started to walk backwards with me to put some distant between me and Lauren.

I looked up and saw all of them Alice, Jasper, Rose and as soon as I saw him I saw red again and I was trying to fight my way out of Emmett's hold.

"Fucking let me go Emmett. Fuck just get off." I shouted.

"No Bella." Emmett replied calmly "Jasper calm her down." He said simply.

"Fuck no, I have every fucking right to be angry at every single one of you." I said keeping a hold onto the anger. Every time I sneaked a glance at Edward he looked so guilty, sad, hurt. Fuck he had no right to feel hurt he was the one who told me he never wanted me and the anger hitting me twice as bad each time.

"What the fuck let go of her now." Jason shouted at Emmett and I felt Emmett's hold loosen and I managed to slip out. I grabbed my weed from my bag lighting it up to calm me down and I saw all the Cullen's look at me sadly.

"Stay the fuck away from me, all of you." I sneered as I walked away from them all.

"What the fuck Bella. Fighting her really, are you trying to get kicked out on your first day." Ashley said.

"Fuck of." I said walking back to my car and driving off from all their shocked faces.

I need something, anything to take all this pain and anger away, there was only one person to call.

He picked up after the third ring.

"Hello, Drake speaking." He said.

"Drake." I said as sobs took over.

"Bella, where are you?" he asked worried.

"Just got home." I said through tears.

"I'm on my way. I'll be there soon." He said cutting off.

I walked up to my room and slammed the door shut. As I passed the mirror I saw a glimpse of how bad I looked.

I had a bloody lip, a black eye forming and I could feel my ribs were bruised from Emmett's hold.

I curled up into a ball and the tears took over.

"Oh god Bella, what happened to you?" Drake asked as he came to my side.

"I got into a fight." I said.

"Well I hope the other girl looks worse." He said laughing lightly.

"Much." I said laughing with him.

After talking for hours he decided he was taking me to a party to get my mind off of everything.

"Who's party?" I asked.

"Ben." He said.

"Oh cool is his girlfriend called Angela?" I questioned.

"Yeah, such a cool girl." He said and I agreed.

As soon as we got there he got us both a drink. After ten shots, two vodka's and plenty more beer I was wasted and not to add how much we have smoked.

"You look so sexy right now." Drake said with his hands roaming all over me.

Ill admit I looked hot for once I had my strapless dark blue dress that came mid-thigh and matching dark blue heels.

"Thank you, you don't look to bad yourself." I slurred which caused him to laugh.

He moved his face closer and closer until our lips touched.

"I want you so bad right now." He whispered across my lips.

"Then take me." I whispered back.

We started to kiss each other urgently, he picked me up and took me upstairs, we went into the first room we saw which luckily was empty, and he locked the door then turned back to me.

"Arr, so damn sexy. Fuck." He moan as my hand went down his trousers.

He took my dress off in recorded time which caused me to giggle.

I started to take his top of but he got inpatient and took his top and trousers off himself. He brought his hands behind my back and unclipped my bra, he then pulled my knickers off and his own pants. My movement on his dick carried on up and down, his hardness making me wet by the minute.

"So wet." He whispered as his fingers went over my clit. He suddenly started to pump in and out of me with his finger which caused me to moan in delight.

He got down in front of me and started to lick and suck my clit.

"Arrahh. I….. Can't…. hold….Fuck" I managed to get out in between pants.

"Don't. Cum for me baby, please." He asked.

After a few more pumps I couldn't hold it and the knot in my stomach exploded. I screamed his name over and over.

He brought his face back to mine and kissed me with so much passion. I decide it was mine turn and I got down on him. I stroked his length a few times before I put my tongue on the end of his tip.

"Oh….. Fuck….Mmm." He managed to get out.

I started to suck his length after a while he started to buckle his hips and his moans got louder.

"Cum for me Drake please." I begged. Not long after he did and I licked it all up. He pulled me up to him and he turned us over so he was on top of me. He lined himself up with me and started to pump in and out of me faster than before and before too long I felt the knot in my stomach starting to tighten.

"Come with me Bella. Please." He begged as he got faster and harder into me. Before long the knot was tight and we both exploded and we rode each other through our orgasms, screaming each other's name and holding on to each other.

He feel on top of me panting like I was.

"Amazing." He said.

"Mmm." I smiled.

As soon as he pulled out we both whimpered in loss. He scouted to my side and we feel to sleep in each other's arms.

I woke up with a smile as I saw Drake still next to me, I just sat there staring at his beautiful features.

"Like what you see." He asked amused when I blushed from being caught out.

"Of course I do. What's not to like." I said shyly.

He groaned as I rubbed my hips against his man hood.

"If you carry on doing that you know I will take you all over again." He laughed.

"Maybe I want you to." I whispered sexily.

"Mmm." He said.

He started to chase kiss from my neck to my lips.

"Round two." He laughed as I got on top of him.

We made love once again but this time was more urgent and as he pulled out we both whimpered in loss again. I never wanted him out of me.

"I think we should get dress. I think Ben's parents are back today." He said.

"Okay."

After we both got dressed he took my hand in his and he drove off.

"What do you want to do today." He asked.

"I don't mind." I said lighting up my weed.

We ended going back to his place for round three and four. After the most amazing sex we both got high and had our own little party.

Weeks have passed and I had seen very little of my friends, I didn't go to school much and I was getting more addictive to the drugs. Me and Drake took them daily and I was starting to loose more and more weight from not eating and just smoking, drinking and drugs.

"Bella we need to talk." Alice said coming up to me in the parking lot of the school.

She snatching my weed from me, which made me pissed.

"Give it back." I yelled.

"No." she said as she snapped it in half.

"You bitch." I said as I went for here.

Emmett and Edward held me back, so I couldn't punch her. I started to see red again but this time was the worse it has ever been.

"You need help Bella." She said simply.

"Fuck you." I sneered and I try to break their hold on me.

"Stop it calm down Bella, we are not letting you go." Edward said.

"Fuck off Edward. Why the fuck do you care so much when all this is your fault you left me remember. You fucking left me. I hate all of you" I shouted as both of their holds loosened.

I managed to slip out and just in time Drake show up and I kissed him passionately before getting on behind him on his motorbike.

As he drove off I squeezed him tighter to me never wanting to let him go, not long after we finally arrived at his place. Once we got up to his room he looked at me with concern.

"Bells, what's wrong sweetie." He asked.

"I'm fine." I lied.

I could tell he saw right through the lie I just told him but he didn't push me and that what I like about him he never pushes me for answers.

I held him close to me and kissed him passionately.

"I want you." I whispered.

"Then have me." He whispered back sexily.

He made love to me again and again and every time he pulled out we both whimpered in loss.

"Morning beautiful, good sleep." He said as I started to wake up.

"Mmmm. You." I said.

"Yes."

More months passed and I now hardly ever went to school or saw any of my friends. I was a complete junkie and ill admitted it but I also had Drake who loved me. For the last few weeks Drake started to become more distant, always met up with people and I had been getting worse, I was always throwing up and just the past two day blood has been coming up. I had also got sever pains in my stomach which I knew wasn't normal but I kept it to myself and carried on because I didn't want to lose Drake and I know it sounds stupid but it scares me to be alone.

I hadn't see Drake for the last few days so I decide I should go see him. I lit up my weed and got into my car and drove to Drake's house. I knocked a few times but nothing, the weird thing was his bike was still here. I picked the lock on the front door and heard his music blearing from his room, no wonder her never heard me. I walked up the stairs to his room, I put my hand on the handle and opened the door and I really wish I never came, the sight before me made me want to vomit. He was fucking another girl as soon as he heard the door open they both froze looking at me.

"How long." I managed to get out as the tears started to fall.

"I didn't know you were coming over." He said.

"HOW FUCKING LONG." I shouted.

"A few weeks." He said, looking everywhere part from me.

"A FEW FUCKING WEEKS? WHY DID YOU LIE TO ME, YOU NEVER FUCKING LOVED ME AND YOU'VE PROVED THAT." I shouted as more tears fell.

"I did. I do." He said.

"FUCKING SAVE IT." I said as I ran down the stairs to my car as he followed me.

How the fuck did I fall for all this? Who would really love someone like me? Arrrr I feel so stupid.

As soon as I got in I got completely wasted. I caught my leg on the chair, I fell hitting my head on the corner of my bed as I went down, the last thing I remember was the darkness taking over.

I woke up the next morning feeling the throbbing of my head, shit I'm going to have a bruise now.

After showering and getting dress, I spent the rest of the morning getting wasted. I looked at the clock and it read 8:00am, so I grabbed my keys and bag, and then drove off to school. As soon as I got there, everyone stared at me as I got out of my car, I noticed Drake walking over to me.

"I'm sorry." He said.

"Fucking save it. Everything was a lie and you're just like everyone else. Just stay the fuck away from me." I said shoving passed him.

Arrrr the pain in my head was becoming too much, so I lit up another and took a long drag, once I finished it I made my way to the bathroom in a bit of a hurry because I could feel the vomit threating to spill from my mouth. Once I got there I locked the cubical door and started to vomit violently, more blood coming up. I felt so weak, once I managed to stop vomiting I made my way back to my car but Alice stopped me before I could get there.

"Bella, what the hell…" she trailed of.

My hand started to shake violently and I became more weaker the last thing I saw before the darkness took me was all of the Cullen's worried faces.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

**ALICE POV**

"Oh my god, I'm really worried about her guys? What are we going to do?" I said sadly.

"She needs help Alice, anything we do will just make everything that much worse. She needs space and we should give it to her." Edward said.

I knew deep down he was right but I just had a feeling he might not be it is his fault after all he left her and is like this because of him.

"Alice." Edward growled.

"Well you shouldn't read my mind if you don't like the truth." I said walking away.

I know he feels soo bad about leaving but it is to late the damage is already done and Bella is to far gone to care.

It kills me only being a few feet away and not being able to talk to her, I mean she was my best friend and Edward ruined that for me like he ruined everything.

Arrrggghhhh. I really should stop blaming him because I know he meant well by leaving, I mean he was doing it to protect her and I can understand that I can, it just hard without Bella in all of our lives.

I was outside school waiting for Bella because today I planned on talking to Bella, I don't care what Edward said because everything else he has said and done was wrong, so I'm just going to do what I think is right. After her argument with that drake guy she ran to the toilets and I didn't follow because I knew she need that time on her own, so I planned on talking to her once she was out.

After what felt like years she finally came out and started walking over to her car and I saw that as my chance.

"Bella, what the hell…" I trailed of.

Her hand started to shake violently and she looked more weaker and by now my whole family was here. We were the last thing she looked at before she collapsed.

"Call an ambulance." I shouted at Edward who was just standing there.

He finally got it together and called for an ambulance. Five minutes later they were loading Bella in the ambulance. The ambulance drove off with all us following. As soon as we got to the hospital, Carlise came over to treat her, he told us to all stay in the waiting room and he will come and tell us if anything happens.

As soon as we got into the waiting room I started to dry sob on Jasper's shoulder and I saw Rosie do the same.

**EDWARDS POV**

No, No, No, this couldn't be happening, Bella has to be okay she just has to be. Looking around at my brothers and sisters and my mother, I saw all there pain and it was my fault, Alice was right I should have never left because if I didn't this wouldn't be happening right now. She would be fine and happy.

"It's not your fault Edward." Esme said.

"It is. I should have listened to you all, I should have never left her, If i didn't we wouldn't be here and she wouldn't have started to take drugs. It's all my fault if anything happens to her I swear to god."

"Don't Edward I see what you will do but don't. I'm sorry okay I never meant it we all know you did it to protect her and you know what none of us blame you Edward okay you're our brother and we all love you even if what you think is right isn't." Alice said cutting me off, by the end of it she had come to sit next to me cuddling me and comforting me as I dry sobbed on her shoulder.

"She will be okay and in time Edward she will be happy and off drugs completely okay sweetie." Esme said.

"Yeah and Edward I know I haven't always been friends with Bella but we are all here to help her get through this and off the drugs for good and in time she will understand why you left and forgive you. Just be patient Edward everything takes time." Rosie said.

"Thank you." I finally said.

**JASPERS POV**

I can't believe she had become so dependent on drugs, I mean I know she was hurting when Edward left but then after Charlie kicking her out I guess that was the last straw for her and she couldn't take it, the pain I mean. I just hope she is okay and I know she is strong enough to put a stop to it but it just weather or not it's too late for her.

Alice was soo badly hurt when Bella told us that day she never wanted to talk to us or see us again I mean we all were we all loved Bella, she was a sister to all of us. I have missed her soo much these past months, I miss her cheeriness, I miss the klutz that she is, I miss everything about her. Since she has been on the drugs she looked like…. Like us, pale white and purple circles under her eyes. She did seem happy with that Drake guy but after that argument we all found out he was always lying to her pretending to love her, when in truth he only wanted her for sex and she felt for it. Her emotions where all over and they crushed me so bad, hurt, pain, guilt, unloved, sad, angry, scared, and even more pain. I nearly fell over with the force of it all.

I'll admit at first it was hard to be around Bella and her blood ahhh it smelt so good, but I got passed it and we ended up being friends and more than that she was a sister to me and my other siblings.

I just hope she will except all our help and forgive us and Edward, it would crush him so much if she didn't he really does love her he always has and always will, he just wants to protect her from our kind and I can't say I blame him for that, I mean if Alice was human and I was a vampire I would do the same. Please Bella be okay sweetie we are all here for you.

**ROSIE POV**

Oh god please be okay Bella. I know at the beginning when I first saw her when Edward brought her to our house I hated her so much because I was jealous of her because she could have everything I can't a family, growing up, getting old, and all human experience but after a while we started to talk I was always snappy but we got through it and I told her I was sorry, that's when we became friends and over time we became closer, we always did girly things together and I can honestly say I loved her like a sister she was practically family. When Edward left It killed her and all of our relationships with her and I hated him for that me and Bella had become so close always together then when she told us she never wanted to talk or see us again it killed us all and it was all his fault. But now I can kind of understand why he did it but it don't mean I'm happy with it. I just want her to forgive us all so we can help her through it all, I want to be there for her every step of the way and I will even if she don't want me to be I will. Please be okay Bells so we can get you clean and happy again.

**EMMETT POV**

Shit I can't believe that jerk Drake fucked her over like he did I mean it once I know she is okay I will go find that bastard and hurt him so bad. How could he do that to her she trusted him with everything and gave herself to him even though she has been hurt so many times before, she still gave her heart out and that bastard broke it all over again. Arrrr I just wish she never said what she did and we were still friends and talking because than none of this shit would have happened she would be safe with us. God I love her like a sister and I have missed her soo much over these lasted months and it killed me being near her and not talking to her, I mean it was killing us all even Edward, even though I don't agree with how he has handled everything I still love him he is still my brother after all and he did make the right decision in the end even though it is a bit late, he has still tried to correct his mistakes. I mean it killed him when he saw Bella with Drake even though he didn't say it we all knew you could tell by the way he acted and however when we spoke of her he changed the topic. Every night we all heard him dry sobbing but none of us had the guts to go to him because what was we suppose to say don't worry man it isn't your fault because it was and we can't lie to Edward literally. I miss my Belie Klutz we all want her back and healthy again because right now where she has lost her appetite to the drugs it has mad her thin to thin, she is more like us pale white and purple bags under her eyes. She just doesn't look healthy and it scares me what if she never gets better? I hope she does and we will all help her through the good and bad, we will always and I mean always be there for her.

**ESME POV**

Oh god my poor baby's. I can't believe this is happening to Bella, she means a lot to us all she is part of our family. I know Edward made a mistake but it was to protect her and I can understand that but he should have never of LIED to her and told her he never wanted her maybe just maybe if he told her the truth he well maybe we wouldn't be here. The day Bella left well it killed us all, when she came back we thought maybe she has had time to sort through it all and maybe she is ready to forgive the rest of us. I just hope with all my heart that Bella will let us help her though all this and help her get better and healthier, she has lost so much weight where she has stopped eating and only drinking and doing drug. Arrahh it kills me knowing she turned to drug, why couldn't she just of spoken with me or even Carlise I mean his a doctor he could of helped her in more ways than any of us could have. Please just getting better for us Bella we all love you still even Edward please have it in you to forgive him to please.

**CARLISE POV**

Oh god we just about saved her I really don't know what I would of done if we had lost her.

I walked into the waiting room to where the rest of my family where waiting.

"Carlise, what happened? She is okay right?" Edward rushed out.

"Son, calm down. She will be okay, it was touch and go but she got through it she is a strong girl you know." I said sadly.

No one said anything so I carried on.

"She needs our help, I mean it won't be easy at all but we have to stick by her no matter what. If we want her of the drugs completely we all need to be there okay, she may push us away or say hurtful stuff but we all have to be strong for her and then she will be able to get better I'm not saying it will be a quick and painless situation because it won't be but what I'm trying to say is we can't give up on her okay?" I said.

"We won't." Everyone one said.

"Can I see her now?" Edward questioned.

"Okay but when she wakes up and she wants you out you go okay because we need to make this easy and painless for her." I replied.

"Fine." Edward said.

After leaving Edward alone with Bella I went back to the rest of my family.

"She will be okay though wont she?" Alice asked as soon as I came in the waiting room.

"Yeah but it will be hard for her because it isn't going to be easy for her not having drugs, she will be snappy, angry and damn right pissed off." I explained.

After a while I left and went back to my office.

Poor Edward he is so cut up about this and I'm really scared Bella isn't going to forgive him and ask him to stay out of her life because that would kill him, he loves her so much.

**EDWARDS POV**

Thank god my Bella's okay. I can't believe I hurt her that bad I basically made her take the drugs, if only I had stayed none of this would have happened.

A few days have passed and Bella still hadn't woken up but Carlise said it was perfectly normal for what someone like Bella has gone through.

"I'm so sorry Bella." I said kissing her hand lightly.

"About?" She croaked out.

"You're awake? CARLISE." I shouted even though I knew he would be able to hear me.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER FOUR**

**BELLA'S POV**

Everything was black it was like i was drowning, but I was so far under it was impossible to get back up.

Death. I was dying and there was no way out for me this time, no one here to save me from myself. If only Ed- HE didn't leave because if he didn't none of this would have happened I wouldn't have even touched the drugs. Wait this isn't his fault really it's all mine, he never forced me to take the drugs did he? This was all me and I was stupid enough to end my life this way! I just wish that by some miracle I could have stopped this before it was too late.

It was now too late to get my life back on track and to get my friends back. I miss Alice so much, she was like a sister to me and I can't believe I cut her and the other Cullen's out because Ed- HE didn't want me, even when I'm dying it hurt to say his name. It was like a knife to the heart as I realized that he didn't want me, I mean what changed. You know I kind of knew things would end at some point because why would this beautiful Greek god be with me plain Jane, there was and isn't anything special about me I think I'm the most boring looking person out there.

Arrrr it makes me so angry just thinking about it all, everything that has happened, Ed- HIM leaving, Charlie not wanting me to walking in on Drake and that slut. How stupid am i? why does everyone think they can walk all over me because they can't I am a person with feelings and the only way to take the pain away was the drugs for me they helped me so much but looking back I realized it was a mistake to ever take any of them.

It felt like minutes, hours, days, weeks, years where passing by until It started to lift not by much but it was moving very slowly to slowly for my liking but I was happy because it was lifting.

Time continued and after a while the lift got faster and more noticeable.

BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP.

What the hell is that annoying sound? It was getting louder and louder.

Finally the darkness was lifted and my eyes started to flutter open.

"You're awake? CARLISE." He said.

What, wait he was here?

The last couple of days came crushing back down on me and I could feel the tears fall down and my breathing more labored.

"Bella? Sweetie I'm going to need you to calm down, deep breaths in and out. Can you do that for me?" Carlise said.

I nodded my head not trusting my voice. Finally I calmed down.

"I will be back to check on you later, okay? You need to rest Bella. So everyone out, you can all come back later when she is up for visitors." Carlise said walking out of my room.

I was glad he asked them all to leave because right now I couldn't deal with them, I needed to think but my body was craving for more drugs and I don't know what to do. I was scared and I am scared.

I did the only thing I could think of. I pressed the red button and the nurse came in.

"I need Dr. Cullen. Now." I rushed out.

"Okay dear, calm down." She said walking out to get him.

A few minutes passed and he came walking in.

"Bella. What's wrong?" He asked worried.

"I'm scared Carlise. I need them. I feel like I'm going crazy without them. Please just one, please." I begged.

"I can't I'm sorry Bella. I really am." He said.

"I need help." I said as the tears fell down freely.

"And we are all going to give it to you." He said.

"I can't see them Carlise. I don't think I can do it with them around." I said sadly.

"That's fine. I will help you through this okay, I promise." He said.

"Thank you Carlise, it means so much to me after everything I've done." I said sadly.

"It's fine. I need you to get some rest because tomorrow is the start of going cold turkey, so you will need you're energy. Sleep tight sweetie." He said as he switched the light off and left.

I was glad that the others respected what I wanted and didn't bother me because I don't think I could handle their pity it will only make me hate myself more. Arrr, I just need one drag that's all I asked for. I searched for my phone and texted the only person I knew who would help me.

_Hi John, I need to ask a favor but no one else can find out about this!_

_I will make it worth your time, I just need whatever drugs you got._

_I'm in the hospital and they won't let me out. Please._

_BellaXx_

Five minutes later I got a reply.

_Okay I promise not to tell anyone, I will bring you some but I'll come in and give you them then I am gone okay? _

_John x_

John is Drakes and my dealer but to be honest he was more a friend to me and he would do anything for me.

_Okay. Thank you so much it means a lot to me._

_BellaXx_

After I sent the last message I put my phone back over in the cabinet draw. I took Carlise advice and got some rest as John wouldn't be here until tomorrow.

I was having that same nightmare, where I was going to see Drake and I caught him with that other girl but in my dream they both just looked at me with blood red eyes and laughed, saying I was worthless and she stood by and watched him kill me and drain my body of life, that was around the time I woke up screaming and shaking as my tears fell down.

"Bella? Bella? It's just a dream, I need you to calm down Hunny." He said calmingly.

But I just couldn't I couldn't get myself to calm down.

"Jasper, I need your help." Carlise said barely a whisper.

Jasper came in with a frustrated expression and came closer to my side.

"Carlise. It's not working." He said.

"How is that possible it always worked on her." Carlise said confused.

"I don't know." Jasper said even more frustrated.

Just then Edward walked in and came to my side.

I don't know why but he made me feel safe enough to calm down even after everything he still had that effect on me.

"Good girl, deep breaths in and out." Carlise said.

Eventually I calm down enough.

"Why is it after everything he is the only one to be able to calm me down?" I said coldly.

"I don't know and I'm even more confused as to why Jasper's power didn't work on you. Try now Jasper?" Carlise said.

It worked.

"Maybe it was because she was in such a panic that her whole body shut down." Jasper said.

"Maybe." Carlise replied. "Anyways you need your rest try and go back to sleep, Bella. Come on you two out you go." Carlise said as they all left.

I tried to get back to sleep but it just wasn't happening.

Morning finally came and I was still awake I was just glad John was coming.

Buzz Buzz.

I picked my phone up and I had a text.

_Hey bells, on way now see you soon ._

_John xx_

I put my phone back down and started to fidget, let's just say I'm not a very patient person.

After what felt like eternity Carlise came in.

"Bella, you have a visitor do you want me to send him away." He asked.

"No it's okay." I rushed out a bit too quickly.

"Erm, okay." He said and left.

"Hey bells, how you feeling?" He said coming over to cuddle me while putting the drugs under the pillow.

"Better." I replied. "Thank you for coming to see me." I said knowing he knew what I meant.

"No problem. I'm just glad you feel better. Anyways I have to get to work before I'm late I might come see you later." He said hugging me goodbye.

"Bye." I said before he left.

Once I was on my own I quickly put the drugs down my bra under the horrible hospital gown and made my way to the toilet.

I put a line of coke out and sniffed it, feeling myself relax as it started doing its job. I sniffed the rest up and went back to the bed where Carlise was there waiting.

"Bella, how are you feeling." He asked.

"Perfect." I said smiling and cuddling him, I then jumped on to the hospital bed.

"Bella. Please tell me you didn't." He asked worried.

"Didn't what." I asked innocently.

"The guy this morning brought you drugs didn't he?" He said angrily.

Shit he was mad, very mad.

"Erm no?" I said but it came out more as a question then an answer.

"That's it NO visitors. I mean it." He said even more angry.

"NO YOU CAN'T DO THAT." I shouted.

"I can and I will." He said calmly.

"YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, NONE OF YOU DO. I NEED THEM, IT HELPS ME." I shouted.

"You don't need them Bella, you may think you do but you don't. now get some rest." He said as he walked out locking the door behind him.

"NO." I shouted banging on the door.

Hours passed and the drugs were wearing off and I had soo much anger in me.

"LET ME THE FUCK OUT." I said banging on the door again.

Arrrrahhh. I picked up the chair and threw it at the door, I started picking other bits up and throwing them. Once I finished I slid down the wall and pulled my knees to my chest as sobs racked throw me.

I don't know how long I sat there sobbing but I didn't notice when Carlise walked in and stood there just staring at me with concern and that pissed me of more.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU STAIRING AT. DO YOU AND THE REST OF YOUR FAMILY ENJOY ME SUFFERING LIKE THIS BECAUSE YOU KNOW I'M LIKE THIS BECAUSE OF YOU AND YOUR FUCKING FAMILY. ARRRRAHHH I FUCKING HATE YOU ALL." I said as a new lot of tears took over.

I looked back up at Carlise broken face. After a while he left and locked me back in here.

I was going out of my mind, I needed more, I was losing it slowly.

I found a sharp piece of wood from the broken chair and held it to my wrist. This is the only way I kept saying a I pushed it down, as I moved it along the blood trickled down, it wasn't deep enough to harm me but it was diverting my attention to the pain so I wouldn't think about not having the drugs.

I did a few more lines and watched the blood trickling down started to make me feel nauseated, the room started to spin and I could feel the vomit coming so I bent forward and started to throw up.

Carlise chose to walk in at that moment and saw me.

"Oh god Bella." He said picking me up when I managed to stop throwing up and put me on the bed.

He left the room than came back with clean supplies to clean up all the mess. Once he finished he left then came back to my side.

"Please let me help you. I'm not saying it is going to be easy because it won't be and I'm sure you will hate me at times but all I want to do is help and I will take whatever you throw at me. Okay?" He said.

I just nodded my head as he started to clean my cuts and banged them up.


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER FIVE**

**BELLA POV**

Weeks passed and it felt like I was just getting worse, I felt angry all the time. I hate feeling like this and on a couple of occasions I even tried to kill myself. I mean this isn't me, before all this I would never dream of hurting the Cullen's like I have and I would have never even considered taking my life like I have been trying to do. I've tried so hard but it just isn't working, I just can't get myself out of this because I'm in too deep. The nightmares that I have been having well nightmare because it was always the same nightmare but I just could never wake myself up before it happen, so I have been doing my best to avoid sleeping because that way I wouldn't have to see it all over again and feel the hurt and pain that came along with it. To be honest I looked like death, my skin was too pale, my eyes where dark and had purple bags under them from the lack of sleep and drugs, I even looked too thin from where I was refusing to eat.

Just then Alice walked in with a look of concern, scared, sad and heartbreak. I couldn't look at her because all my emotions went all over the place and it was like I couldn't control them.

"Please." Was all she whispered.

I knew what she meant by it and it broke me up inside, my tears came down faster and I knew what I had to do, if not just for me but for my family too, I had to do this and I will do this. I'm stronger than this, I can do this.

"I'm stronger than this, I can do this." I whispered.

"Yes you are Bella and NEVER and I mean NEVER forget that. We are all here for you and to support you. You're not alone you have all of us and we will get you through this." She said.

"Thank you." I whispered through my sobs.

My tears came down faster and in that moment I knew what I had to do I had to get better for myself and for my family. _"I can do this and I will do this."_ I kept repeating in my head.

Just than the rest of them all came in.

After a couple of hours of Edward, Alice, Jasper, Rose and Emmett just talk to me, even though I didn't say much they carried on because they knew it was helping me and I was glad they all understand me.

After a while Carlise slipped out and came back in with a tray of food but as soon as I smelt it I litterly ran out of bed to the bathroom and started throwing up even though my stomach was empty.

I walked back into the room and saw all there worried expressions.

"I'm ready." I said to Carlise.

"Maybe we should wait a while." He said.

"Carlise I knew this was going to be hard but I want to try something, even if I do throw it up after at least we tried and we are one step closer. Please." I begged.

"Okay, but take it easy. Okay."

"Okay, I promise." I said.

He put the tray in front of me and the smell was making me gag but I ignored the smell and concentrated on Edward who was sitting next to me smiling in encouragement.

It helped a lot. I picked up the yogurt and put a tiny amount on the spoon, as I lifted the spoon to my mouth I carried on looking at Edwards face.

After I swallowed it I realized it wasn't that bad.

"How do you feel?" Carlise asked concerned.

"Not sick, well yet anyways." I said.

"That's a good sign but we will just leave it at that after." He said.

"Okay."

I actually surprised myself and finished the whole of the little pot of yogurt.

"How are you feeling now? Love." Edward asked.

"Erm, Okay." I said.

"Good, well you need to rest now Bella, so everyone out." Carlise said and I panicked.

"Please, NO." I said my breathing labored. "Don't leave me on my own. Please." I begged.

"I'll stay with her Carlise." Edward said as the rest all left.

"Thank you." I said calming down.

"Sleep my love." Edward whispered into my hair as he kissed me on the head.

I fell into a deep dreamless sleep but I knew it was too good to last and I could feel the pain all over again and I started screaming but this time my eyes never opened and I started to panic which cause me to start hyperventilating.

"Wake up love, it's just a dream. Please open your eyes." I heard my Edward say but my eyes wouldn't do what I wanted them to do instead they stayed closed.

After what felt like days everything went black and I felt numb, I could feel the weight of the darkness pushing me further down. I couldn't let it take me I had to fight and that's what I did and it could have been days passing maybe weeks but eventually I won and my eyes started to flutter open.

"Baby. Your awake. Carlise." Edward said barely a whisper.

Carlise came in at that point and started to check me over.

"Bella you have to talk to us. What happen?" He asked.

The rest of the Cullen's came in and I told them everything that happened since i left to when i came back and about Drake and my nightmare. By the time I had finished Emmett, Jasper and Edward where shaking from anger about what Drake did to me.

"Please, just let it go I have." I lied.

"Yeah and look where it got you." Edward snapped.

"That was below the belt Edward." I said as a few tears escaped.

"I know and I'm sorry I didn't mean it." He said wiping away my tears.

"I know." I whispered.

THREE MONTH LATER

It was three month ago since I told them about what happen and since then they have all been helping me so much. I have to admit I was starting to look healthier, my eyes where brighter and the purple bags where gone, my skin looked less pale, I had more color and I had also gain a bit of weight which was really good. Carlise was impressed with the amount of improvement I have made and he was letting me leave the hospital on two conditions. One – I had to move into the Cullen's house. Two – I had to stay in doors for a few more weeks just so I don't get tempted and slip up.

I had also erased all the numbers I may be tempted to call but to be honest I don't think I will slip up because I'm happy and I have so much support, that they wouldn't ever let me slip up.

Things between me and Edward where better, we talked about everything and we are on the mend, I mean I've not totally forgiven him but in time I will. He stayed with me 24/7, the only times he left my side was when I showered and went to the toilet and I was glad he still stayed around after everything I had done and said but I'm in a much happier place with them all with me.

"Hey bellies, how you feeling today?" Emmett asked just like he did every morning.

"I'm good thanks." I replied.

"I'm glad. I love you lil sis." He said hugging me.

"Love you to bro." I said hugging him back.

"What do you fancy doing today." Alice said bouncing down the stairs and next to me in a second.

"We could watch some movies." I said.

"Ahhh come on I mean you're free to leave the house and you want to stay and watch films." Alice said.

"I'm not….. I just don't think I'm ready."

"You are Bella." Alice said.

"NO. Okay I'm not just leave it." I said running up the stairs and slamming the door behind me.

My breathing started to get labored and I started to panic. Just then the door slammed open and Edward was in front of me trying to calm me down, after a while I calmed right down.

"What happened?" Edward asked.

"I'm scared….. About leaving the house." I whispered.

"That's normal Bella but you have to try I never said it would be easy, this is going to test you every way possible. I'm sorry." Carlise said.

"I know but what if I can't ever do it." I asked.

"You will. It just will take time." He said before leaving with the others.

"I'm always here for you Bella please just talk to me." He asked me.

"I promise." I lied.

Weeks have passed and I could feel myself falling. I could feel myself getting more and more depressed but I couldn't stop it. We tried three times but I failed to even get outside and that's how it started, then I stopped talking to the others. I thought I had beaten it but I obviously hadn't. I needed them but I had no way to get them so I turned to the only solution I could think of.

"Carlise please just one that is all I'm asking for please." I begged.

"Bella, I thought you was passed the worse but begging really? Do you think I'm that stupid to give you any?" He said angrily.

"PLEASE. JUST ONE." I shouted.

"No." He simply said.

I was so mad that once I was in my room and my door locked I began to cry. I walked in to my bathroom and just stood starting at my reflection. I didn't like what I saw I hated the girl staring back at me. I smashed the mirror, all the little pieces of glass fell down leaving my hand a bloody mess, but it didn't bother me the pain I mean it actually helped my mind focus on something else, so until I could get my fix I would have to focus on the pain. I picked up a piece of the broken glass and brought it to my arm slicing from the cress of my elbow to my wrist. The blood was pouring out but I didn't care because I could focus on something other than drugs.

I heard banging from my bedroom door but I just ignored it and wrapped my arm up. A few minutes later Edward came running in and I just snapped.

"Just get the hell out NOW." I shouted.

"What the hell have you done to your arm Bella."

"Nothing, Okay so just get out."

"No not until you tell me what the hell is wrong." He yelled angrily.

"YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW." I shouted.

By now I notice that everyone was in the room.

"Yes." He said simply.

"I CANT DO THIS I NEED SOMETHING ANYTHING, IM SERIOUS I NEED DRUGS EDWARD AND I CANT DO IT, I CANT LIVE WITHOUT THEM." I shouted.

"NO. YOU'ER WRONG YOU CAN DO THIS BELLA YOU CAN." He shouted which shocked us all as he has never shouted before.

"JUST GET THE HELL OUT ALL OF YOU." I shouted but no one moved. "NOW." I shouted again but this time they all left.

I have to get into Carlise office because I know he keep medication in there. That is it I can ask to borrow a book and go in and look for them. I started to plan out what I was going to do but at the same time blocking my thoughts so Alice wouldn't see what I was planning.

After a while of planning, I went down stairs with shaking hands and really sweaty. I was way beyond nervous I was terrified. What if they knew I was up to something? By the time I was downstairs I was nearly having a panic attack but I had to try and calm myself before Jasper noticed.

"Bella are you okay?" Carlise asked.

I tried my best not to get angry and shout.

"Erm fine. I was wondering if I could borrow a book." I asked flatly showing no emotion.

"Sure, go ahead." He said.

I walked upstairs to Carlise office and as soon as I was in there I started to search but I was being careful and quite at the same time after what felt like hours, I finally found a pack of painkillers, they would have to do for now. I put them down my bra and left the office. I jumped as I saw Carlise in front of me.

"Sorry I didn't mean to scare you Bella." He said.

He was looking for something, but what.

"So what book did you get." He asked.

Shit in my haste to find them and get out I forgot the book. Shit.

"_Come on lie Bella." A voice said._

"Oh I couldn't find anything for my taste." I said.

"_That's it."_

"Oh." Was all he said.

I walked off quite quickly and locked my bedroom door behind me.

I got the painkillers out of my bra and put them all in my hand, I swallowed them one by one felling myself relaxes.

After a while I felt happy and carefree. I turned the music I had on to the max and I carried on dancing and singing along to it.

Edward chose to come in at that moment and just stared at me.

I started to feel nauseated and I ran to the bathroom and started to throw up. Once everything was emptied from my stomach, I got up and washed my face with cold water. My hands were shaking violently and I began to fell sweaty and my head was pounding.

"Bella. Are you okay?" Edward asked worried.

Shit I completely forget he was even here and my angry flared.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CARE, JUST GET OUT AND OF YOU." I shouted as I noticed them all walk in.

"CAN'T YOU ALL JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, NOT ONE OF YOU TRULY CARE BECAUSE IF YOU DID YOU WOULD GIVE ME WHAT I WANT BUT NONE OF YOU ARE." I shouted.

None of them said anything they just all left and I was glad they did because the tears began to fall and the pain I was feeling was excruciating. I knew what I had to do. I went into the bathroom and got out the broken piece of glass and began on my arms. After I clean myself up I put on a baggy long sleeve top on.

The next day I was awoken by shouting.

"THERE IS NO EXCUSE SHE STOLE FROM ME."

Shit they know what I did. Crap. Just then the door was banged open and a very pissed looking Carlise walked in.

"Why did you do it Bella?" He asked.

"_Play innocent Bella don't let them no." A voice said._

What the hell?

"Do what?" I asked confused.

Listening to that voice because I realize that she was helping me or at least I thought she was.

"_That good keep lying Bella." That voice said again._

"You stole them painkillers Bella we know you did." Carlise said.

"JUST BECAUSE I HAD A DRUG PROBLEM DOESN'T MEAN I FUCKING TOOK THEM. YOU KNOW WHAT JUST FUCK OFF AND FIND SOME OTHER JUNKIE TO BLAME." I shouted.

Once they all left she spoke again.

"_Well done Bella. They actually believe you." She said coming closer to me._

She was quite scary with long blood red hair and bright red eyes, half of her face was burned which made her look even more scary.

"Who are you?" I asked her.

"_You are a really convincing liar when you want to be." She said evilly totally ignoring my question._

"Who are you?" I asked again.

"_You're worse nightmare." She said before disappearing into thin air._

What the hell?


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six**

**JASPERS POV**

"Jasper, what is she feeling now." Edward asked me after we left Bella's room.

"She's angry, sad and….. and she is terrified." I said confused.

Why in the world would Bella be terrified?

"What is she terrified off?" Edward questioned.

But as soon as that emotion came it went just as fast.

"Edward I'm really worried, something is wrong. As soon as she knew I felt she was terrified the emotion went as fast as it came. Can you hear that, who is she talking to?" I said.

We both went into her room and saw her talking to herself?

"What the hell." I whispered so low that only Edward could hear me.

We both walked away to find Carlise to find out what is going on.

"Carlise what the hell is going on with her. She was talking to herself Carlise, taking to herself."

"Calm down Edward, maybe this is getting worse. If she is seeing things or hearing things, she is going to be even more paranoid. This whole thing is going to get worse." Carlise said sadly.

Arrahh everyone's emotions came crushing down on me I had to get out away from them all, I can't take it all.

**EDWARDS POV**

"I thought she was getting better?" I said to Carlise.

"We all knew it wasn't going to be easy. Trying to get her to go out was what set it all off and to be honest this was always going to happen and we all knew it." He said.

"I can't lose her again. I just can't because I don't think I could survive this time." I said as I dried sobbed.

"We will all get her through this I promise." Carlise said.

"But what if she can't? Then what?" I said getting angry.

"She will Edward, you need to believe that." He said.

"Okay but what do we do now." I asked.

"I think we should leave it a few days before we bring her back to the hospital." He said.

"Okay." I said as I walked off to see Bella.

**BELLA POV**

What the hell does she want with me?

_Bella, Bella, Bella. she kept repeating._

"What do you want with me?" I said.

_I want your body and the further you lose yourself the more of myself is going into you and soon Bella sweetie your body will be mine. She laughed._

"No." I said.

Just then Edward walked in and she disappeared.

"Hey you okay, you don't look so good." He said.

"I'm fine." I snapped.

He looked sad but I still couldn't find it in me to care right now I had a psycho bitch who wanted to take over my body, which I had to do everything in me to try and stop her, it was going to be hard but I could do it, maybe I should ask Edward for help, no he would have me committed straight away, no, no one could know I was alone on this one.

A few weeks passed and I stayed to myself, locked in my room, she was always here, I could feel her in me bit by bit I was losing my own body. I had to do something and this was the only way, I kept telling myself.

Two years later

I had finally recovered from the drug problem I had it was a dark and difficult time in my life and I never wanted to go back, I needed to move on from it. I had the amazing support from Esme, Carlise, Rose, Emmett, Jasper, Alice and Edward they all stuck by me through the good times and bad times of my recovery.

If I didn't have them I probably would be dead right now as much as I hate to admit it.

"Edward?"

"Yes, Bella." He said.

"I love you Edward I always have and always will, I need you in my life." I said.

"I love you to Bella and I'm so sorry for leaving and for lying I never meant to hurt you all I ever wanted to do was protect you." He said

"I know and I understand why you did leave and as much as I hated you for it I would have done the same if it was the other way around." I said.

The rest of the afternoon we spent talking and we sorted through all of our problems and I was glad. I still didn't truly forgive him for lying to me but it going to take time and we were both up for trying.

Two weeks later

Things where great between Edward and I, I would say we were near enough back to normal.

I stepped closer towards him and kissed him with every ounce of passion I could.

Things started to get heated and he went to stop things.

"Please, don't, I want this." I begged.

He didn't look to happy at first but he soon got back into the mood.

We made love that night and it was amazing.

"Morning beautiful." He said kissing my forehead.

"Mmm morning." I said blissfully happy.

"I love you." He said.

"I love you to Edward." I said turning to him.

We went for round two and a three before we got up and showered together.

"Oh god." He said angrily when he saw my body in the mirror.

"It's fine Edward, we knew something like this would happen, but its fine, I promise." I said kissing him.

"No, no its not, I've hurt you so bad, look at all the marks on your body?" He said.

"Please don't ruin this moment for me baby, I'm blissfully happy right now." I said.

"Okay, but this can't happen again." He said seriously.

I just ignored him as I got into the shower.

"I'm going to talk to Carlise I'll see you in a bit." He said before leaving.

I felt more of myself, I mean I'm starting to feel the old me coming back, I didn't feel the need to want to take drugs and with me and Edward back on track, my life was starting to feel complete.

After dressing in the clothes Alice had laid out for me, I went downstairs to find Edward.


End file.
